Lock down!

Just those words put panic through me. I'm an anxious person anyway. My brain digests everything it sees and it's hard work. Today we have been told to stay inside.. again! It's not new only now its official. We have to stay indoors unless it's absolutely necessary. The stress and anxiety took over in my house tonight. Over the past year I've discovered I'm actually more introvert than I thought. Not fully by any means, I love a good friendly meet up and a dance. But my mind doesn't particularly thrive where it can't process so I've become partial to one on one meetings, real conversations and getting rid of the small talk. I also have learnt to work in a certain way and relax at certain times. So being told all we can do is be stuck in a not very big house together for who knows how long, is quite surreal and scary.
Joshy had a melt down. He doesn't like change. He cried for a good 45 minutes and was brave enough to say 'it's been bubbling inside for a while and I just couldn't help it'. I get it! He's 10! Evie cried and in her mumbling said 'I miss happy turtles, I miss my school friends and I don't know what i want'. I get that too. Shes 4. Sam is just tired. I really get that! Hes 8. How can a 10, 8 and 4 yr old feel things so deeply... I belive they should understand but not that they should worry. It's so sad!
Hone schooling is hard. My husband is a primary school teacher. I've worked in the early years 22 years. And we didn't enjoy it today. But we did have the most beautiful walk which refreshed my outlook of only for a short time. The forest is a beautiful place to isolate that's for sure.
Anyway, it continues. I hope you're all finding happy moments. Please talk if it gets too hard. I know I need to. Not seeing the other people I love is harder than I imagined. But staying home is the right thing to do so that I can see them again!
Kx